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Men pay us £5 a minute to humiliate them on the web: Three internet dominatrixes reveal all

Dominatrixes claim to have saved marriages and even do couples sessions

Source: Thesun.co.uk.

UK – BUSINESS is booming in the world of the online dominatrix.

It is estimated there are a thousand women advertising online in Britain, charging up to £5 a minute for everything from acting out fantasies to forcing men to bathe in custard.

Some “dommes” report earning more than £1,000 a day while a survey by Durex revealed 37 per cent of men say they enjoy bondage.

Last week Doctor Leendert Verstraten, 55, hit the headlines after sending an online dominatrix a picture of himself in a torture device – while wearing his surgical scrubs.

He has since been suspended from Aintree University Hospital.

Here DIANA APPLEYARD speaks to three online dominatrixes and a psychologist to find out why it is a growing trend.

‘Everybody has a kink’

MISTRESS ANA is 34 and lives with her partner in Glasgow

She says: I’m what I describe as an “old-school femme domme”. I am a strict disciplinarian and I like to really find out what makes my clients tick.

I’m happy to wear the latex if they politely request and book accordingly but I won’t get naked.

I often carry out my webcam sessions wearing just a pair of jeans and a blouse. It’s what I say that is important.

If they want tasks I will issue them. But often they want to talk and explore their fantasies with someone who won’t be horrified.

Between sessions I can be doing anything from editing video and posting comments on Twitter to chatting to my mum on Facebook.

I started off working in Asda as a teenager but then got into the world of online sex chat lines after spotting an ad in a magazine.

I was utterly amazed at how many men out there love to be humiliated by a dominatrix. I firmly believe that everyone has a kink – some are just more extreme than most.

These are men with responsible jobs but they need this as a form of release.

I don’t see their needs as weird or perverted – to these men they are liberating. I firmly believe I save marriages because this gives men an outlet they could not get with their partner.

I charge £2.50 per minute and feel I’m fulfilling a growing need in today’s society.

‘Couples come to me for inspiration’

MIA HARRINGTON, 38, is single and works from her “chambers” in Brighton

She says: I am inundated with men asking to use my online services.

I do some webcam although mostly I prefer to meet my clients face to face as I think they get a much more valuable experience.

But the internet is perfect for men who don’t feel they are ready to actually visit a dominatrix, so I will take on some online clients and charge around £2 a minute.

My clients are men, women and couples. They all enjoy serving me. Some like to act out unusual fantasies.

Couples enjoy getting inspiration from my work so they can act out more at home. It’s mainly about escapism and to most it’s about letting go of stress and allowing someone else to be in charge for a while.

I take away all the pressures and strains from everyday life. During our time together they can be anything they want to be.

Most fantasies aren’t sexual as many people might think. The strangest request I have ever had is from a man who wanted to dangle naked over a boiling cauldron. Sadly, I couldn’t accommodate him.

My clients are from all walks of life – businessmen and women, teachers, doctors, lawyers, tradesmen.

Some are rich, some save up to spend time with me. These are normal people you would see walking down the street.

I think the reason most men want to use an online dominatrix is curiosity.

Using a dominatrix is taking that extra step into a more extreme world – and it can be highly addictive.

‘I punish as I do dusting’

MISTRESS CURSE, 29, lives with her boyfriend in North London

She says: This job is all about multi-tasking. I can work while doing the household chores.

When I’m “punishing” a submissive over Skype or FaceTime I can be doing a bit of dusting.

Men will even pay just to stare at my feet for hours, so I put the laptop camera on to my feet then carry on with whatever I am doing.

Nothing can surprise me any more in this profession. I’ve been working as an online dominatrix for two years now and I love it. We are overwhelmed by the number of men who want to be dominated and humiliated.

I have men who’ll pay £3 a minute to watch me put on my make-up, or eat a meal. I charge more if they put on their webcam so I can see them too – that’s £5 a minute.

They like that they are being ignored – it’s all part of being submissive.

I’m happy to dress up in latex and the fetish gear but often they like me in normal clothing.

I’ve made naked clients smother themselves in custard or my personal favourite – jellied eels. It never fails to make me howl with laughter but they don’t seem to mind.

It’s not my job to judge these men and my boyfriend doesn’t mind.

He finds it funny and loves the fact that so many men are fantasising about me.

Psychologist’s view

Behavioural addictions professor Dr Mark Griffiths, of Nottingham Trent University, says:

“There is no doubt the internet has made the world of domination much more accessible.

“Men who might find meeting a dominatrix face to face too threatening will feel they can safely access their service online.

“Most people get more disinhibited when they are online.

“It lowers your emotional guard and you feel you can safely reveal your deepest, darkest secrets.”

See more and larger photo’s: www.thesun.co.uk.

Attorneys for man charged with killing Chandra Levy say Gary Condit has history of ‘aggressive sex’

Source: Washingtonpost.com.

USA – WASHINGTON – Two purported ex-lovers of former California congressman Gary A. Condit told the FBI that he had a penchant for bondage during sex, and one of the women said he was “aggressive” with her during a sexual encounter, according to a new court filing.

The statements, made in 2001 to agents investigating the disappearance and slaying of federal intern Chandra Levy, were cited by defense attorneys representing the man facing retrial in the case.

At a hearing in D.C. Superior Court on Thursday, the attorneys for Ingmar Guandique asked to depose the women in preparation for his trial. They said the accounts of the women, who were not publicly identified, could help their client and point to Condit as a “main suspect” in the killing.

Calls Thursday to Condit, who has returned to private life, were not immediately returned. Two lawyers who have represented Condit did not return calls for comment.

Levy was a 24-year-old intern with the Federal Bureau of Prisons when she disappeared May 1, 2001. The case gained national attention because police investigators at first looked closely at Condit, with whom Levy had an affair. Authorities later ruled him out as a suspect.

Levy’s remains were found in 2002 in Rock Creek Park. Guandique, who had pleaded guilty to attacking other women in the park, was charged. He was found guilty of Levy’s murder following a 2010 trial, but his conviction was overturned last year and he is set to be tried again in October.

The retrial has prompted a reexamination by prosecutors and the defense of evidence collected 15 years ago. The women’s statements were not provided to the initial defense team; prosecutors concluded the information was not relevant, and they had questioned the credibility of one of the women, according to court papers. But the new trial judge ordered the government to provide the defense with reams of potential evidence.

Guandique’s team of attorneys with the District’s Public Defender Service said in court that they wanted to seek sworn testimony from Condit’s onetime girlfriends in case the attorneys decide to argue at trial that Condit, and not Guandique, killed Levy.

“We want to make sure that when the trial happens that the jury will have all the relevant facts,” attorney Jon Anderson said.

The defense said in their filing that the women’s statements make Condit a suspect because when Levy’s remains were discovered, a pair of jogging tights was found nearby. Each leg of the tights had been tied in a knot, and prosecutors during the first trial argued that Guandique used the tights to restrain Levy in the park. Neither Guandique’s DNA nor Condit’s was found on the tights or on Levy’s remains.

“Aggressive sex involving bondage is not an entirely safe activity, and Mr. Condit would have had a powerful motive to dispose of Ms. Levy’s remains — and her tights that had been tied in knots — if she died during sexual activity with Mr. Condit,” Guandique’s attorneys wrote in the filing.

Assistant U.S. Attorney Deborah Sines said in court that Condit’s sexual activity had nothing to do with Levy’s death.

“This is sensational, salacious and an effort to taint the jury pool,” Sines told the judge. “They can’t make the argument that because he had sex with someone years ago, you can infer he killed Chandra Levy. You can’t do that. You can’t do that with these witnesses.”

According to the defense filing, one of the women told an FBI agent that she and Condit had a sexual relationship in 2001, allegedly around the same time the married congressman was also having an affair with Levy. According to the interview, the woman said that she and Condit had “aggressive sex” a few months before Levy disappeared and that Condit displayed a desire to tie her up with articles of clothing.

The woman also said Condit’s then-attorney tried to get her to sign a false affidavit stating that said she did not have a romantic relationship with Condit, according to court papers. She refused to sign the document.

The second woman told an FBI agent that she and Condit were in a sexual relationship about five years prior to Condit’s involvement with Levy. The woman told the agent that Condit liked to tie her up during sex and that he preferred an iron bed with posts for bondage purposes, the court papers state.

The second woman told the FBI agent that during their relationship, she became “scared” of Condit, according to the filing. She said that when she came forward, she attempted to do so anonymously because she “feared repercussions from Condit” for telling the FBI about her relationship with him.

Judge Robert E. Morin ruled that the defense may travel to interview the first woman, who has health issues. Prosecutors said the second woman would be available to come to Washington for Guandique’s trial, so Morin found a defense trip would not be necessary.

Guandique’s attorneys in November alerted the judge that they were seeking information and evidence from prosecutors about Condit, including his phone records, photographs and other information regarding his relationship with Levy.

Guandique, now 34, has maintained his innocence and is in prison for non-deadly attacks on other women in Rock Creek Park around the time Levy disappeared.

See more and larger photo’s: www.washingtonpost.com.

Racism Makes People Horny: Confessions Of A Real Dominatrix

Source: Cracked.com.

USA – Sex is like nutrition: The only people who know anything beyond the basic mechanics are the ones who get paid a lot of money to dive into it face-first. Any idiot can figure out how to work a sex, but the deeper reality of what turns people on is rarely as simple as sticking Tab A into Slot B (or C if it’s your birthday). To sort out the hows, whats, no seriously whats, and dear god whys, we talked to a dominatrix named Natasha. She told us …

5. Parental Issues Are Commonplace

A man who happens to enjoy a good spanking is often accused of having “mommy issues,” and we all try not to think too hard about the weirdness involved in calling a male partner “Daddy.” It’s not just a cliche. In Natasha’s experience, “parental issues” are a very real thing. When it comes to fetishes like wearing diapers and being spanked, “about 85 percent of them have been neglected by their mothers [or] have run in on their mothers having relations with the post office guy, brother-in-law, maid, or Santa, and it fucks them for life,” she says. “As I do. I fuck them. In the butt.”

“Every time I’m having an AB/DL [adult baby/diaper lover] session, they all tell me how they end up that way, and it always starts out with, ‘So when I was younger, my mom …'”

But it can be any combination of trauma/fetish that triggers it: “Whether a tooth was pulled when it wasn’t ready, an aunt or uncle had you on their lap for too long, you walked in on sexual acts … even experiences of younger siblings having their shitty drawings higher on the fridge than yours can spark fantasies that will [make you] want to relive it.”

These scenarios can often be the most challenging from a creative standpoint, because the clients’ requirements are very, very specific: “These fetishizers want a full reenactment of the scene. Sometimes I’ve been allowed to ad-lib, but most of these men have been doing this for over 10 years and are stuck in their ways.”

For example, “One client likes to be put in a diaper, and he likes to pee and sometimes poop on himself. His mother had a short temper and wasn’t patient during the potty-training phase. Also, she was very stern with him, so when he’d wet the bed (as any kid under 10 does), he’d get punished and embarrassed in front of his friends and family instead of trying to work out what the root cause for the accidents were. So when we session, I have to embarrass him. I bring in other girls sometimes and I humiliate him as they all laugh, point at him, and push him around. He’d been spanked by his mother when he’d pee or poop, so I spank him. He’d been put in time out, so I put him in a cage. His mother made some remark like he ‘must be a dog because they go whenever they want,’ so I say that too, and put a collar and leash on him and make him fetch and roll over.”

Sometimes they literally bring mommy into it: “I can’t be too detailed with this one, but a client walked in on his mother and maid and saw his mom pinned down, and fuses that scene in his past with a wrestling session,” Natasha says. “So when we are wrestling, I have to talk about how strong and beautiful I am, how I’ve defeated his mother, and how she licked my pussy.”

Somebody piledriving us into the oblivion while shouting about how our mothers did things to their genitals? That sounds like one of our high school bullying sessions. But change that context just a little bit, and you could wind up with a fetish. It’s like every day you roll the dice with your nether bits and hope it doesn’t come up diapers.

4.Racism And Sex Get Mixed Up A Lot

All sorts of complex emotional struggles can get tangled up with your genitals. As a black dominatrix, Natasha has a unique perspective on the ways race in particular gets sexualized. “I’ve participated in sessions and have had it somehow turn into me being a slave who got her freedom and wants to take it out on the master, while being reminded of how good I cleaned the Big House. I have sessioned with racist cops, racist babies, racist rapists, racist patients (where I play the doctor). I don’t stress it because I physically take it out on them when it’s my turn, but I’ve turned down repeat customers.”

Now, Natasha has the power to end a session at any time, but sometimes it catches her off-guard. Man, surprise racism is the worst kind of racism. “[There was a] guy who has a fetish of owning women, and I was submissive in that session. So I’m keeled over his lap and he’s asking me whether I’m a cooking slave or a cleaning slave. I was so shocked that I burped,” she says. “But he kept spanking me until I answered. I told him I do both, but he didn’t like that answer and whipped me some more and told me about the auction he got me from.”

So … you’re not allowed to complain about difficult customers at your job anymore.

3. And Now, For The Fluids

During one of Natasha’s sessions, “a man stuck his finger in my butthole and pulled a ‘nugget’ out and ate it. That was actually the second most nauseating experience I’ve had at the dungeon. The thing that got me wasn’t the moaning and the intensity of him eating it — it was the direct eye contact that he gave me. He didn’t blink. It was like he was eating Cheetos residue off of his fingers. He’s a great guy, though.” Just needs an Altoid now and then.

Whoa, don’t check out now. There’s a lot more butt stuff incoming. “I can make a client ejaculate through penetration in less than 10 minutes,” Natasha proudly proclaims. And nobody becomes an expert colon puncher without a few bumps in the road. “Sometimes men want a police baton (the racist suspect session) or a baseball bat (replay of a hazing he went through), and there will be blood. And poop. I have dealt with sessions of men whom I am convinced eat Taco-Bell-flavored street hot dogs on their way to the dungeon, and I have burnt clothes and showered in bleach.”

Luckily, Natasha gets to turn the tables now and again: “Gold showers, ruby showers, brown showers — daily life. I’ve pooped on clients and have made them eat it. There’s this guy who holds a competition with four or five girls to see who can make him drink the most pee, and he tips the LOSERS $100, so I drank so much water over the course of the hour that it took for him to arrive. It felt like the equivalent of UTI, but I won.”

And that’s all that matters, isn’t it?

2. The Masochism Stuff Gets Pretty Hardcore

Natasha’s clients want to orgasm all the way to the hospital. She remembers how in her very first session, “this guy wanted me to cane him. Cool, right? But he wanted me to cane him until he bled … I kept watching to see if he was getting faint, and he just kept asking me to go harder … I swear he got stitches when I finished with him.”

“The most nauseating experience was with a customer who wanted sounds done,” Natasha remembers. “For those of you who do not know what sounds are, they’re long metal rods that are meant to dilate passages.” Oh, let’s not get clinical now. We’re talking about shoving metal rods into a dick-hole.

So: “This guy wanted to have some passages dilated, and wanted to use every single size that came in the set. There are many different types of sounds, and some can be up to a foot long. So once he was prepped and the sounds were lubed, the insertion began. After the second-to-last one came out, we saw the blood. He believed in going hard or going home, so we got to the last one … so I’m at the last sound — basically plastic hanger or AAA battery status — and there’s more blood coming out mixed with the lube, and it’s making my stomach turn. The part that put me over was pretending to enjoy making him jerk off into his own mouth and watching him eat his blood-infused sploosh. I didn’t eat for two days after that.”

Holy shit. We, uh … we may be able to beat that record.

The not-eating thing! Not the sounding thing.

God, no.

1. Butt Stuff Can Ruin Lives

The typical relationship trajectory of Natasha’s rectally-inclined clients tends to go something like this: “They get married and … are either too ashamed to tell their wives, or have tried but [their wives] can’t or won’t fulfill their desires.” So they “choose to lurk in the night (or during lunchtime) to purge some of the sexual pressure that’s built up.”

Since Natasha’s services aren’t cheap, their lives are eventually consumed by the frantic shredding of credit card bills, and the stress inevitably takes its toll. “Saying two-thirds of them are divorced is probably an underestimated guess … Being single means they don’t have to explain their finances to anyone.”

It’s a sad life, but luckily, Natasha is there at the ready with lube and sympathy. “When a client tells me that it’s his first time at a dungeon, or he’s been visiting dungeons for 20 years, because he has not had luck with finding someone who can put something in his butt, that means he’s been denied and looked at with disgust,” she laments. “I can see it on their faces a lot of the time. It’s really sad.”

Sex workers: Doing the weird stuff so you don’t have to since always.

So more and larger photo’s: www.cracked.com.

BDSMradio.EU T-Shirts: Let the world see you’re BDSM minded!

Source: BDSMradio.EU.

HEEMSKERK – You know that feeling you expose the world to see you’r doing BDSM? In the hope that you will meet interesting BDSM minded people?

Now is the chance to show it and, even help BDSMradio.EU to stay on the internet financially.

The shirts will be sold at the Kinky Warehouse Sale in Spijkenisse on June 5 for € 19.50 each.

If you are not present and still want a shirt? Mail me at bdsmradioeu@hotmail.com with the subject: Shirts. Do not forget to mention the size (S till XXL) and whether it is a men’s or women’s shirt.

The shipping costs are not included.

Greetings and BDSM fun,

tom verhoeven

The men who live as dogs: ‘We’re just the same as any person on the high street’

Human pups like to live in packs, play with squeaky toys, eat from bowls and nuzzle their ‘handlers’. Ahead of a new documentary, Spot, Bootbrush and Kaz open up about their community

Source: Theguardian.com.

UK – It’s easy to laugh at a grown man in a rubber dog suit chewing on a squeaky toy. Maybe too easy, in fact, because to laugh is to dismiss it, denigrate it – ignore the fact that many of us have found comfort and joy in pretending to be animals at some point in our lives.

Secret Life of the Human Pups is a sympathetic look at the world of pup play, a movement that grew out of the BDSM community and has exploded in the last 15 years as the internet made it easier to reach out to likeminded people. While the pup community is a broad church, human pups tend to be male, gay, have an interest in dressing in leather, wear dog-like hoods, enjoy tactile interactions like stomach rubbing or ear tickling, play with toys, eat out of bowls and are often in a relationship with their human “handlers”.

In the documentary, we see Tom, AKA Spot, take part in the Mr Puppy Europe competition in Antwerp, a mix of beauty pageant, talent show and Crufts; David, AKA Bootbrush, talk to camera in a leather dog mask; two pups walk through London pretending to wee on lampposts to raise awareness of their identity; and lots of men jumping up for “treats”, barking and wagging their mechanical tails.

When I speak to Tom, he is keen to point out that puppy play is about more than just outfits and surface-level power games: it’s about being given licence to behave in a way that feels natural, even primal. “You’re not worrying about money, or food, or work,” says Tom, who works as an engineer in a theatre. “It’s just the chance to enjoy each other’s company on a very simple level.”

Tom’s discovery of puppy play came about gradually. He knew he liked sleeping in a collar, had a fetish for skin-tight clothing – Lycra, rubber, even off-the-peg cycling shorts – then came a dalmatian zentai suit he found on eBay, a £1 orange lead from Pets at Home until, eventually, a man in a club walked up to him and said: “Oh right, so you’re a pup.” The realisation was not without its repercussions: it led to a breakup with his former fiancee Rachel and a move into a gay relationship with his new handler. Colin.

“I wouldn’t say it was the catalyst, but it was the straw that broke the camel’s back,” says Tom. “Then I had this moment of panic because a puppy without a collar is a stray; they don’t have anyone to look after them. I started chatting to Colin online and he offered to look after me. It’s a sad thing to say, but there’s not love from the heart in me for Colin – but what I have got is someone who is there for me and I’m happy with that.”

For David, a writer who works in academia, puppy play is an escape from the analytical world. “It’s so totally non-verbal,” he tells me. “It’s pre-rational, pre-conscious. It’s an instinctive, emotional space. But within every puppy is a person. This is part of my identity, but it’s only part. I’m also a vegetarian, play the piano; I have a parrot. I was planting tomatoes on my allotment this morning. I can go months without going into pup space.”

The psychiatrist Carl Jung argued that our conscious minds contain intuitive, emotional, sensation and thinking archetypes. Are the sort of men drawn to puppy play simply exploring their intuitive self? “Absolutely,” says David. “Puppy play is exactly that – play. There is an immense amount of pleasure from gambolling around in a club playing with squeaky toys because you’re making people laugh, you’re being a cute little puppy. The gay scene can be very serious, scary and offputting. But if you’re going in with a little puppy hood, ears and a tongue, you look cute. You’re allowed to bound around and be enthusiastic, mischievous and friendly.”

Kaz, another pup, argues that for some, being a puppy isn’t just a fun mask to try on – it’s how they identify; it’s who they are. “Even when I worked in PC World I would sometimes walk up to people and nip at their shirt,” he says, laughing. “I got in trouble once; someone walked into the PC repair centre and I had part of their dad’s computer in my mouth. But the other staff knew I was like that to everyone. They didn’t find it weird.” For Kaz, pup play can be summed up in the phrase: “Be dog”. He will socialise as a pack, enjoy physical closeness with other pups and always eats out of a dog bowl at home. “It’s just nice, it makes me feel comfortable,” he explains, before adding “But I always eat with a knife and fork and at a table. Otherwise it’s time-consuming and you can’t watch TV.”

What is the attraction, for pups and their handlers? “You are trying to grasp the positive elements of the archetype of the dog; the loyal companion,” says David. “Some pups are solo, of course, but for me the puppy identity is focused on the bond between me and Sidney, my handler. I’ve been collared to him for 10 years. If anyone comes near him I growl like a little bull terrier. And I’m a people-pleaser in my human life. I get a great deal of pleasure from making other people happy.”

Then, of course, there is the sex. Puppy play is often part of a larger sexual practice that crosses over with leather folk, furries and BDSM. But, as Kaz is keen to point out, not always. “People automatically jump to the conclusion that this is gear we wear to have sex. I used to get asked awful questions like, if I liked having sex with dogs. But it’s certainly not that, and it’s not always sexual. Members of my pack, we spend a lot of time together at home just being dogs. There’s nine of us and my partner is our handler. A big part of it is a feeling of family and belonging; we’re there to look after each other.”

Whether we see it as a kink, an identity, a reaction to an early experience, a form of escapism or a fetish, the main thing, says Tom, is that we see it at all; that we know it’s there and accept it. “It feels like you can be gay, straight, bisexual, trans and be accepted,” he says. “All I want is for the pup community to be accepted in the same way. We’re not trying to cause grief to the public, or cause grief to relationships. We’re just the same as any other person on the high street.”

• Secret Life of the Human Pups is available to view on All4 now.

See more larger photo’s and video: www.theguardian.com.

Eurovision Schlong Contest: The secret fetish porn past of Russian favourite

EXCLUSIVE: Snap which shows naked star holding saw to a woman’s throat rocks Moscow

Source: Thesun.co.uk.

RUSIA – EUROVISION favourite Russia was last night caught in a fetish porn blunder after pictures emerged of its contestant seemingly posing for a series of explicit snaps.

Sergey Lazarev, 33, is seen sitting naked on a bed while menacingly holding a saw to the throat of a woman handcuffed to a radiator.

But the Kremlin dismissed claims its star man was a porn actor, insisting the images were taken to highlight domestic violence issues.

Other nude pictures of Sergey have appeared on gay porn websites, much to Moscow’s annoyance.

The Kremlin has spent millions of rubles recruiting the former gymnast — who first impressed on Russia’s national talent competition before a stint on their version of Strictly — and turning him into Eurovision-champion material.

Officials are so desperate to finish top in Stockholm, Sweden, tonight they have copied previous winners’ music, lyrics and staging to get Sergey over the line with You’re The Only One.

His routine includes an interactive video backdrop similar to reigning champion Mans Zelmerlöw’s Heroes, which won Sweden the title last year.

Sergey’s performance in Thursday’s semi-final put him odds-on with bookies for tonight.

Moscow was in the dark about his nude photos until last month and has hired computer experts to try to wipe all trace of them from the internet.

A source said: “The picture of the girl handcuffed was supposed to be arty and highlight domestic violence issues but it looks like they are glamorising it.

“Officials don’t want this photo getting out because it looks so weird and creepy and could scupper their bid.

“Russia has spent an absolute fortune on Sergey, it is really desperate to win this year.

“It has copied every winning formula to try to appeal to as much as Europe as possible.”

Sergey has rarely talked about his private life and kept the lyrics to his song gender-neutral. All interview requests have been closely controlled or turned down by Russia’s Eurovision team.

A Russian delegation spokesman last night said the photo with the handcuffed woman was taken in 2008 and was not intended to glamorise domestic violence.

See more and larger photo’s: www.thesun.co.uk.