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DOMINATRIX REVEALS WHAT IT’S LIKE TO RUN A SEX DUNGEON HOTEL

Source: Independent.co.uk.

UK – LONDON – Madame Caramel first dabbled with BDSM sexual fetishes when she was 24-years-old. “I met a wonderful man that opened my eyes and the door of my soul,” she tells The Independent.

As she dived into the scene and became a dominatrix – adopting the alias Madame Caramel – she decided to combine her five years of experience in luxury hotel hospitality with her love of the fetish scene. “I’m a kinkster at heart,” she says.

She opened the Hoxton Dungeon Suite in the east of the capital – with its population of Londoners, city bankers and hipster-types – four years ago. Since then she has welcomed visitors from all over the world, from Russia to the Middle East and mainland Europe. The majority of her guests come in pairs – “unless i’m hosting my infamous private gatherings with friends”, she says.

Every desire (well, at least those that are legal ) is catered to at the flat in Hoxton. Beginners can start out with soft whips and eye masks. Advanced members of the BDSM scene can meanwhile test out her sensory deprivation tank or toilet box especially designed for water sports.

BDSM staples – from ropes and whips to bondage and a black rococo throne – come with the cost of the room, which starts at £450 for two weeknights. But due to misuse by previous customers, some equipment is only available under special request an additional £20 hire fee. Those include the inflatable body bags, vacuum bed – where a person crawls inside a PVC suit attached to a matress where only their mouth is visible – and electronic stimulators which are clamped to a person’s bodyparts.

“The equipment in my dungeon reflects my personality and the type of play I enjoy but I also cater from novice players or old school players. I have an extensive collection to suit all,” says Madame Caramel.

But other than the niche equipment, the Hoxton Dungeon runs like any other hotel. In many respects, running a fetish hotel is pretty mundane. “We also have an iPod docking station so you can bring your own music and create your own atmosphere,” the website cheerily alerts potential guests.

Guests can also use the kitchen, which is equipped with a cooker, fridge and freezer, microwave, kettle, toaster, pots and pans, glasses, tableware, a champagne bucket and a decanter. After an intense session in the dungeon, guests can kick back with some wonderfully vanilla Champneys bath products.

Her maid, whom she only refers to as Anna, takes care of the bookings, while Madame Caramel does some of the bookkeeping and the marketing by travelling to fetish fairs to promote her apartment.

Madame Caramel and Anna give guests a run-through of equipment and special requests when they enter the apartment. But the real hard graft starts once the guests have checked out.

“Overnight stays start from 7pm and check out is at 11am. Then my cleaners enter the flat to clean and disinfect everything that was used. We know what was used because guests are instructed to place all in a box provided so we can clean it,” she says. Every two months, she adds, they deep clean the flat.

And it seems to pay off. The reviews on Madame Caramel’s website are overwhelming positive. “The place was immaculate with robes, towels, flannels and quality shower gels,” wrote one reviewer. “There is a good supply of condoms and lube to be safe and clearly marked boxes to put used equipment and wipes to clean the large items after use. You really have the feeling that this place is cared for and that hygiene is important to her so you feel safe with everything you use.”

The reviewer goes on: “Since my last visit HDS now has soundproofing,” adding: “As ever she had provided a bottle of fizz on ice and crisps and chocolate in the fridge and of course tea and coffee making facilities.”

Aged almost 40 now, Madame Caramel recently hung up her PVC stockings and mouth ball gag and quit being a dominatrix to focus on her BDSM apartment – and training the next generation of dominatrices.

See more larger photo’s: www.madamecaramel.com.

LINKS:
Website: Madamecaramel.com.
Twitter: Twitter.com/MadameCaramel3.
Fetlife: Fetlife.com/users/181393.
Tumblr: Madamecaramel.tumblr.com.

Ex-dominatrix Jenny Nordbak’s BDSM book: ‘The Scarlett Letters’

Source: NYdailynews.com.

USA – Recent college graduate Jenny Nordbak answered a job ad declaring “no experience necessary.”

And what an experience it turned out to be.

The 22-year-old soon found herself working in a Los Angeles sex dungeon, putting a leash on a major Hollywood star, as she reveals in her astounding new book “The Scarlett Letters.”

It was 2010 when she opted for a masters in BDSM rather than heading to graduate school — and received an education beyond her most twisted expectations.

Nordbak was making ends meet as a construction site clerk when she went for the job. Her new employers promised to train her, and she had plenty to learn.

First was the glossary of terms. Everyone new to the business starts as a submissive — or “Sub.” In this operation, dominatrix was an aspirational position that required both an apprenticeship and a test.

Intimate knowledge of crops and whips is a basic requirement for a “Domme” — never mind the equipment too sexually explicit to name. Think lift and separate for the male nethers.

Nordbak’s ambition was to become a “switch,” capable of slipping into the shoes of either a Sub (ones that can take a beating) or Domme (heeled leather boots on legs that don’t quit.)

As on any construction site, Nordbak was hazed on her first day on the job in the Dungeon.

An imperious Domme, Mistress Erin, informed the newbie that her first client was in the waiting room. The obviously nervous young guy’s opening gambit was, “I’m waiting to be paid.”

Nordbak, as Mistress Scarlett, instinctively knew where to go with this.

“Have I been a bad girl and I owe you money?” she purred seductively. “Maybe you would take some other form of payment?”

The scene quickly got away from Nordbak as the guy kept stuttering that he just needed the cash. Mistress Erin finally broke it up, striding into the room to pay the bewildered pizza delivery guy.

On his next delivery, he brought a posse of eager friends to the dungeon.

Clients were full of surprises. Nordbak — dressed in a pink tutu and white corset — was sent to service “Sissy Harry” with instructions to look shocked while humiliating the size of his penis.

“Whine about how you thought it would be bigger,” she was told.

Feigning surprise was not a problem when Sissy Harry revealed his rather prodigious package. Still, she managed to choke out again and again, “Why is it so small?”

After an hour, Harry brought his magic beanstalk back down to size with an indescribable gymnastic feat.

Harvey (another pseudonym) was a client who pushed Nordbak as far as he could. He claimed to be into light spanking, but his sessions were never that.

“Make sure he doesn’t sneak any heavy implements into the room,” she was warned. “It’s his favorite move and he’ll hit you with something way too heavy when you aren’t looking.”

Their scene took place in the dungeon’s “classroom,” where she appeared as a schoolgirl reporting to the principal. Harvey draped her over his knees for a hand spanking.

When he bent her over the desk and used paddles, the action was bearable at first — but not for long. Nordbak foolishly refused to react even as it became obvious that silent defiance was the wrong call.

“Some want to hear the girls make noise of pleasures,” she explains. “Others want to hear squeals and grunts of pain. Some want tears. I didn’t make a peep.”

Though she knew Harvey could tell she was in agony, Nordbak refused to break. Behind her back, he grabbed a decorative ruler from the wall and struck her so viciously that “my mind exploded in pain.”

Nordbak struggled to stop him, but Harvey held her down. At the end of the session, her skin was broken and bleeding — though she learned two critical lessons.

One was to assert herself sooner than later. The other was that Arnica works wonders on bruises.

Another glossary word is SAM, smart-assed Masochist, the most difficult Sub for a Domme to control. Nordbak stumbled into the role one night when her client Tom was so lame with the whip she couldn’t stop giggling.

“A SAM will talk back, laugh at you, demand more at every turn,” she recounted. “If you can break a SAM it feels great, but it leaves both of you exhausted and sometimes unhappy.

“As a Domme, I learned not to give into them.”

She tried to give Tom what he wanted that night, but he caught her giggling again at his finale. Nordbak realized she was developing an attitude problem as a Sub.

It was Dom, the Dungeon’s lone male Domme, who provided an education in what it really means to be a Sub. The session involved a blindfold, Vampire gloves, a knotted rope and a spanking horse.

She collapsed sobbing in Dom’s arms afterward. He explained that she was in the “Sub space,” having totally lost control. As a Domme, her job was to take clients there.

While those clients would find the experience euphoric, many needed tender cradling afterward to right themselves. There was much to learn on the way to being a Domme.

The right selection of crops and whips from the inventory wall was critical to keeping control. But hands-on experience was essential in learning to inflict plain.

A client named Alex eagerly submitted to serving as her practice dummy. After being introduced by his Domme as a “worthless piece of s—,” he was ready to roll.

Nordbak unveiled an array of hand paddles and various floggers, ranging from riding crops to rattan canes. Electro-play — involving toys with names like the Violet Wand — would wait.

The cane posed a real challenge. Even cracking it next to the skin could send a Sub into shivers. Wrapping it around a Sub’s body when striking a blow only make the implement unpredictable.

Sometimes, the strike was crueler than intended and skin was broken. Nordbak misplaced a few blows, but even a session that ended in tears usually sent a Sub home satisfied.

Alex’s reward was to lick clean the soles of her boots as she spewed abuse at him.

In time, she could wield a bullwhip with the best of them and crack a swirling single tail whip with elegance and menace.

Nordbak’s goal was earning her stripes as a Switch. The day of the test, she appeared before the Dungeon’s owner, Lady Caterina, with another trainee, The Minx, as her “bottom.”

Her rope work was weak, Nordbak knew, but she had the basics of bondage down. She also was strong in the torture of male genitalia, an art in itself. The latter soon came in helpful when a major movie star walked into her session room.

Nordbak’s test scene was almost child’s play: Face-slapping, verbal humiliation and nipple torture with paddles and a light flogger at hand. Nothing she hadn’t already done a hundred times before.

It was Mr. Mega-Movie Star who taught her a trick not to be found in a BDSM big primer.

On his first visit, he swaggered into the room wearing shades and smacking gum, while flashing the “million-dollar smile” recognizable to anyone on the planet.

Nordbak quickly roped him to a cross and with a combination of flogging and tugging, drove him wild. Afterwards as they cleaned up, he promised a surprise when he came round again.

Next time, she took him directly in the depths of the dungeon into the cave. His first sexy move was to pull off the sunglasses that made him more recognizable, not less, and perch them on her nose.

Mega-Movie Star reached into a small leather satchel and produced a selection of urethral sounds, metal rods for insertion. A long time practitioner, he handed Nordbak the thickest one.

Nothing more can be said except that it ended happily for both. Mistress Scarlett took almost as much sexual pleasure as her client when he coached her through several variations.

Even so, after two years the same-old-sado of the Dungeon was growing old. In retirement, she freelanced a wild scene that shocked even the jaded at Burning Rock.

But Mistress Scarlett dropped the whip for the right man.

Kris worked the site construction where she was employed. At first he was almost too gentlemanly, but she adjusted. They married, and now have a young son.

These days, Nordbak is best known online for her mommy-blog ‘Baby in a Backpack.’ She and her husband travel the world with their boy, visiting exotic locales while staying in luxury hotels.

Happy ending? You know it.

See more larger photo’s: www.nydailynews.com.

Test your sexual orientation with BDSMtest.ORG

Source: Klapjes.com.

WORLWIDE – Many of you have taken a BDSM-orientation test on Fetlife. But that one is behind a registration wall. For us new, there is now a more direct accessible test. And anonymous.

Mind you, the average duration is about 15 up to 30 minutes. Here is what the results look like: online and there’s even a printable PDF.

Happy testing!

See larger photo: www.klapjes.com.

BDSM FOR BEGINNERS’: EVERYTHING I LEARNT WHEN I WENT TO A BONDAGE WORKSHOP

Source: Independent.co.uk.

UK – Fifty Shades of Grey has sparked an interest in BDSM across the globe – upon the first film’s release in 2015, there was a sharp and sudden increase in people searching for the term online, according to Google Trends.

However it turns out that the film is in fact not an accurate depiction of BDSM at all – it’s one of the first things I learn in my ‘BDSM for beginners’ workshop.

“It’s rape, it’s abuse, it’s not an accurate representation,” says professional dominant and leader of the workshop, Master Dominic.

It’s a Monday evening and I’m in a dimly-lit basement room in The Book Club in Shoreditch, East London. Sitting alongside me in rows of chairs are a mix of men and women – some are with their partners, others with mates, a few are alone.

Part of The Book Club’s ‘sex-ed for adults’ series, we’ve been promised an “introductory workshop in kink” – we have been assured, however, that there will be no audience participation.

I am usually the type of person to volunteer, but even I might draw the line at this one.

As someone who knows little more about BDSM than what one sees in Fifty Shades – and I’ve only seen the first film – it doesn’t take me long to realise I have a lot to learn.

Master Dominic is blunt but hilarious in an understated way. Most importantly, however, he is undeniably an expert in BDSM despite the fact that – as he points out – “there’s no qualification.”

He encourages us to ask questions whenever we feel like it, and away we go.

Before you try BDSM
“BDSM is not something you can just have a couple of beers and fumble your way through,” Dominic tells us. Which, I feel, is quite important considering that’s how most people lose their virginity.

I’d never actually considered how one would go about experimenting with BDSM, but when you think about it, how would you bring it up?

Dominic says you should just say it and then do as much research as you can.

It’s also important to discuss what language your partner likes and dislikes – Dominic recommends using verbs over nouns, so asking “How does that feel?”

The next key step in preparing to try BDSM is to work out what everything feels like on yourself first. “You need to try things out in a non-sexy way because bondage can induce panic,” he says.

Dominic tells us various stories illustrating just how important it is to do this – the woman who thought it would be a good idea to walk over her partner in stilettos, for example, or the man who decided to put kebab skewers through his nipples.

I alternate between nearly falling off my chair with laughter and wincing at the thought of the pain. Fifty Shades certainly doesn’t show how much can go wrong.

“You have to learn how to scare the living sh** out of someone but in a sexy way,” Dominic says. And I realise there’s a lot more to this than just blindfolding someone and giving them a little spank.

Dominic drops a bag of terrifying props on to the floor and I see things I’ve never seen in my sheltered 24 years on this earth.

How to get into a BDSM session
When you’re in a long-term relationship, you see each other in pyjamas so how do you suddenly put on a corset and switch into different personas?

Maybe my pink polka-dot PJs aren’t as sexy as I’d like to think.

So how do you start?
According to Dominic, the trick is for the dominant person to leave the room for five minutes – this gives the submissive the chance to get into what’s known as “sub space” and allows them to decompress, get ready and feel comfortable.

When the dom comes back, they need to be suddenly bold and in charge rather than polite: “Nothing says dominance like crippling anxiety,” Dominic deadpans. He has a point.

Impact play
According to Dominic, there are three most common interests when it comes to impact play: bondage, spanking and feet.

Feet? Seriously? My friend and I exchange puzzled looks because, well, we both think feet are gross.

It’s spanking, however, that is the entry-level area of BDSM.

Dominic’s first top tip surprises me: “Don’t hit them in the kidneys,” he says. And again, I am confused. Why would anyone want to hit someone in the kidneys? Perhaps I am too innocent for my own good. Am I missing something inherently sexy about the kidneys?

The main rule is not to hit anything that isn’t protected – it’s best to stick to the bottom, and particularly the fleshy area where the bum cheeks meet the top of the legs. This, he says, is “the sweet spot.”

Oh, and don’t bend over so your buttocks are stretched out – the more taut the skin, the more likely it is to bruise and split. Ouch.

Start off gently because you have to build up tolerance to impact play, apparently. And whatever you do, don’t use a cane, which Dominic says is a particularly British vice. I can’t decide whether this surprises me or not.

If you’re the spanker rather than the spankee (my terms, not his), you should cup your hand and hit 25 per cent less hard than you think your partner can stand.

Dominic rotates his hands in circles and his wrists click loudly and continuously – the result of years of spanking. You have been warned.

One of the other main forms of impact play is using a flogger – Dominic suggests you start with a small one made of leather or faux fur.

You should flog in a downwards motion and continue for three and a half to four minutes. This is, apparently, the optimum length of time for the sub to relax and enjoy it.

I imagine trying to do any of these things without knowing anything about how to do them properly and cringe – it must result in a lot of awkwardness and pain.

A question pops into my head and – having been encouraged to do so at the start – I decide to be bold, stick my hand up and ask: “Do you wash the sex toys?”

The room reacts in a mix of sniggers and chuckles. I decide never to ask a question ever again in my life.

Dominic, however, respects my question and explains that you should wash toys in hot, soapy water, spray them with Dettol and hang them up to dry. Once a month should be enough if you’re not using them loads.

“Insertables” however – his word not mine – need to be thoroughly cleaned after each use though.

I try not to giggle at the word.

Sensory deprivation
The most important thing to remember when trying sensory deprivation is to have a safe word – oh, and it’s not about pushing someone to their limit.

Some clever so-and-so in the audience with me asked how you have a safe word if someone is gagged, and Dominic said you need to have a hand signal.

He does not recommend gagging and binding someone at the same time, but if you switch between the two, you need to switch safe words too.

He explained the challenge of not breaking the sexy bubble whilst equally ensuring no one panics. Hmm. Quite the dilemma, I imagine.

As a dom, you need to trust that the sub will use your safe word – one of the ways you can avoid panic setting in, Dominic explains, is by ensuring the sub can set themselves free.

“Knowing you can get out of it yourself removes panic 95% of time,” he says.

As the session draws to a close, I notice the dog snoring in the row behind me which somewhat ruins the sexy vibe.

Before I went to the workshop, I imagined everyone would be sitting there cringing, but they weren’t. Although we laughed throughout, it was refreshing how, well, casually but seriously the whole topic was treated.

And by the end it was safe to say I understood how real BDSM isn’t anything like Fifty Shades at all. Who’d have thought it?

See more larger photo’s: www.independent.co.uk.

5 signs you love dominating him in bed

Source: Femina.in.

USA – If you display dominatrix tendencies, all we can say is your man is one lucky chap. It can be a fun experience to dominate your partner in bed, and for most men it’s the stuff their dirtiest fantasies are made of. Here are five signs that show you love being the dominant one in bed.

You love going cowgirl
Woman-on-top or the cowgirl position lets you control the rhythm and pace of your lovemaking, and well, rock his world. The thing you love most about going cowgirl is the place of power and control it puts you in, and having your way with your man is the best kind of high for you.

You aren’t afraid to initiate sex
It’s not that your partner is passive or not interested in sex, it’s just that you always want to get there first. So when it comes to pulling him in for a lingering kiss or stripping his clothes off, you’re not afraid to set the ball rolling.

You know your props and toys
Your knowledge about the different kinds of sex toys and props is quite profound. You love using your toys in bed and have no qualms about getting your man to use them on you too.

You’re all for sex adventures
If you’ve ever pulled your guy into an empty closet for a quickie, raise your hand! You love the surge of adrenaline that shoots through your body whenever you indulge in something risky and adventurous. In fact, many a times, you’re the one who suggests taking sexy-time out of the bedroom and someplace dangerous.

You show him how it’s done
You know what you want in bed and you don’t mind guiding your partner to help you get it. There’s no embarrassment or awkwardness there, and you think it’s actually exciting to show your partner how you like it done.

See larger photo: www.femina.in.

Doma SM Suite The Hague

NETHERLANDS – THE HAGUE – Doma is a worldwide and famous BDSM name. For many years there was the Doma Club. Now afther 4 quiet years Doma is back with the BDSM Suite runned by Mistress Diva Nikita Wilde.

DOMA SM SUITE
Stylish SM play suite in The Hague for rental

The suite is completely decorated. We offer couples the opportunity to make dreams come true. The DOMA SM suite is the perfect place for workshops, party’s and meet & greet events. Reception for professional ladies and gentlemen. Give your BDSM world a professional glance by playing with your customers in a stylish SM suite.

We have the perfect place for film- and photo session.
DOMA is a standard in the SM world, since 1979. Doma stands for quality and personal involvement. The DOMA SM suite has been re decorated (Watch our gallery) and is perfectly matching the needs and demands of these days. DOMA SM suite has all the needed licenses and permits that the council of The Hague asks. Because we specialize in rental, we do not mediate between professional Ladies or Gents. Mistresses and Masters who advertise on our website may use our suite. You have to contact the persons you want to play with yourself. Minimum age is 21. Reservations can be made 7 days a week from 10:00 until 24:00.

www.domasmsuite.nl.
0031(0)703601822

LINKS:
Doma SM Suite:
Website: Domasmsuite.nl.
Facebook: Facebook.com/JohnvanDoma.male.
Twitter: Twitter.com/johndomasmtv.
Mistress Diva Nikita Wilde:
Website: Divanikitawilde.nl.
Twitter: Twitter.com/DivaNikitaWilde.