Source: NYpost.com.
USA – NEW YORK – She’ll whip you into shape.
A mother who works as a dominatrix rakes in $4,000 a month while working only during school hours.
While her kids are away from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m., Emme Witt, 48, tortures men for their pleasure.
She conducts web sessions, phone calls and messages with her 20 male clients throughout the day before her sons, Oliver, 13, and Gabriel, 12, come home.
“As soon as I drop them off, I turn on my phone,” Witt, from Los Angeles, said. “I have to parcel out that time, as I can’t do it when they’re around.”
Being a dominatrix, she continued, “works really well with being a mom,” especially a single one. She even uses what she’s learned as a mother on her clients, despite wanting to keep the two worlds separate.
“The way I treat men has no bearing on the way I treat my children, but what I’ve learned psychologically from my children helps me in this world,” she said. “There is a lot of male immaturity – when men try to manipulate me, the tactics are very similar.”
She remembers one night at 10:30 when a client begged to see her, throwing a “tantrum” when she declined.
“He was like, ‘Please, please, please, I need to see you!’” she said. “It’s like [a] child who wants a chocolate bar: You just have to say no.”
While she’s teaching grown men to behave, she’s also attempting to normalize sex work and debunk the myths of it being “immoral” or “perverted.”
“I’m a taxpayer, I’m a mother, I have been in your child’s classroom and I’m also an adult worker.”
She’s been able to teach art at her children’s school and has held various corporate jobs, even achieving a master’s degree, but she “didn’t like the commitment.”
“I like the creativity. I like that I’m able to be very imaginative,” she said of her current role. “The way I keep people on the phone or texting, I’m improvising – they’ll give me information and I’ll give something back.”
“I’m creating a world – you can’t be just like, ‘Yes,’ ‘No,’” she continued. “It’s showbiz!”
She first found her calling as a dominatrix when she was 27 and struggling with $30,000 of debt. When Witt was creating a documentary about Latin rock bands, she stumbled across a woman at a concert who revealed she was a dominatrix.
“My curiosity was piqued because I knew it was a very lucrative job and yet I didn’t think somebody like me could do it,” she admitted. “I was very shy and a ‘nice girl’ with a university education, and I didn’t think I had the strength to embody this dominatrix persona.”
But the woman convinced her she fit the bill, even inviting her to a “slave party.”
“I whipped a man that night, and I really saw that I could do it,” Witt said. “It really challenged my concept of my identity.”
After three years of being a dominatrix, she moved to Spain and back, living a “very suburban, vanilla life for about 10 years.” But she found herself divorced and in need of money as a stay-at-home mom.
Working as a dom “got me out of debt once, and so when I left my husband I already knew that this was the way that I was going to save myself financially,” she said, despite being out of practice.
“I was nervous; I kind of lost my mojo,” she continued. “I had thought being a dominatrix was like riding a bike, something you never forgot, but I actually had forgotten, because I had been in this different mindset for so long that it was hard to get back into it.”
She advertised her services online and used a friend’s house for sessions, eventually building up a clientele who begged her to punish them.
“This sort of clientele is very interested in having their penis size demeaned – sometimes this is real or imagined,” she said. “They tell me, ‘I have a small penis and I want you to laugh at me.’”
The men she sees “want to be humiliated,” she said. “They want to demean themselves for my pleasure.”
“It’s difficult for people to understand because when they think of sex work, they always think that it’s women being humiliated by men and being made to please men, and my job turns all that dynamic on its head,” she said.
During sessions – which can last from three minutes to seven hours – Witt is not the entertainer. Rather, the men masturbate or have sex with other men on camera while she watches.
“It’s pretty niche, but I would say that it’s very widespread, the amount of men who have these fetishes,” she said.
While her job is to dominate, when she returned to the trade as a mother, “I had more difficulty being sadistic to people, so I rebranded myself as more of a compassionate dominatrix,” she said. “When I worked in my younger years, everything was consensual, however, I didn’t have a problem going to that far-off place where I was piercing people’s genitalia, whipping them until they bled and just being very rough in a way men enjoyed.”
But now, she has “trouble getting into that headspace.”
“A lot of people expect I should feel ashamed or guilty, and yet this line of work has been very lucrative for me. It has helped me in many ways,” she said. “To feel ashamed because this job is socially taboo, I’m just done with that.”
She plans on revealing her day job to her sons when they’re old enough, but not now. In the meantime, she tells them she’s a “consultant.”
“I do feel when the time is right I can explain it to them. I feel it is very important to let my children know that I don’t feel shame about this type of work that I do,” she said. “It’s a good way to start the conversation about what is healthy, to not be ashamed of their sexual urges and if they do [act on them] that it is consensual.”
Being a dominatrix, she said, has given her the opportunity to “explore myself, my own sexuality and grow in confidence.”
While she admits some of her clients’ fetishes “come out of shame they’ve felt about sex growing up,” she doesn’t want her sons to feel that way.
“A lot of people will think I’m perverted or I’m a bad person or whatever, and that just isn’t the case,” she said. “Instead, all this investigation and exploration into my sexuality is something I can use to help my children.”
But her sex education expands beyond her kids – she wants to normalize sex work and adult content everywhere, especially as a “normal person.”
“The worlds of BDSM and adult labor are so criticized, and I think it’s very important to just get the word out that there are normal people like myself involved who are able to have healthy, productive lives,” she said. “You can do this work and be a normal person, but not only that, you can be a good mom – it has no bearing on your ability to bring up your children.”
